Friday, July 14, 2006

This Week on a Very Special Swedish Sloth

We here at Swedish Sloth HQ are really inspired by all your thoughtful comments over the past couple of years. In fact, so much so, that we have decided to give back to the thriving community that has arisen around this blog.

Without people like Dipshit the Finno-Ugaric language specialist from Nowhere, Iowa, where would we be today? Not number #1 draw on the international imaginary jetset chat show circuit, that I can tell you. Probably still dreaming about fucking my sister. Shit my sister reads this blog, so maybe I shouldn't say that. If it didn't happen before I turned 15 it's probably not going to happen.

So, where were we? Ahem, we were so inspired by the blah blah blah thriving community around here that we are going to add a section called Ask The Swedish Sloth.

Go ahead, ask away! Don't be shy... Ask The Swedish Sloth. Keep in mind I'll be in Tuscany for the next three weeks and won't read your questions until I get back.

But that probably doesn't matter as hardly anyone ever comments. Most people don't even try. Ricky are you out there? Erik Gray? Drop me a line. I'm sure you must have some questions. 15 people a day read this blog (before they figure out its not what they expected and leave). Surely 15 people can't all be wrong, all the time. Can they?

Saturday, July 08, 2006

Meet Jerker. No Really. It's Jerker.

Jerker is a common first name in Sweden. Here is a picture of a Swede named Jerker I got off the Internet. Looks a bit like a Jerker, doesn't he?

I found out about the name during a meeting with someone else named Jerker last week. Needless to say, people named Jerker will probably never get a job in the USA outside the porn industry. And then there is the question: do people call him Jerk for short? That's not much better.

For those of you who don't know American English... the closest translation of Jerker into British English would be 'Wanker'.

All of our names probably mean something funny in another language. Somebody should compile a database. I googled for one but it doesn't seem to exist. I wish I had some free time beause that would be a million dollar idea. Any investors out there wanna go in with me? A database of stupid names could be the next YouTube... and we already have our first entry.

On a side note, I did find out that IKEA (surprise surprise) makes a computer desk called a Jerker... which is probably appropriate as well for some of us. Apparently though it doesn't do the work for you. You still have to jerk it yourself.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Swedish versus British Nightclubs

Thanks to my wonderful sister in San Diego who sent me this 'educational' Powerpoint presentation. This one shows the difference between a night out clubbing in Sweden and a night out clubbing in England. And the winner is... ugh, I'm gonna go with Sweden.
Download the File