Sunday, June 25, 2006

Fatties of the World, You Bite!

Since I moved to Sweden I lost about 15 kilos. It was nothing I tried to do... it just happened naturally over the course of 8 months. The developed world is getting fatter and America is still superpower of obesity. You simply cannot get a small size of anything there. I admit it feels good to have shed some weight, but the problem is that I am still 15 kilos overweight. And it's not coming off anymore.

So I made a goal at the beginning of the year to lose 10 kilos by June. Now it's the end of June and I am still 99 kilos. That's like 220 pounds. That's like 2 pounds I lost this whole year! What a load of piggy bollocks!

The goal seemed pretty realistic. It was just 2 kilos per month. Fuck. The sad part is I walk for an hour over my lunch break instead of sitting and eating like everyone else. And I often walk home from work which takes about 75 minutes. And I run once or twice per week and I try to eat nothing I actually I want to... and I drink about half of what I want to... and even then I drink wine instead beer.

When I was a pudgy kid the doctor joked that if there was ever a famine I would remain alive longer than almost anyone because of my body's natural ability to store fat. Gee. That's some consolation prize. Back in the 70's almost no one outside the state of Wisconsin was fat. Kids were almost all skinny. I would rather be skinny and die with the rest of normal humanity than be one of a few fat people on earth wandering around by myself looking for a cold keg of beer and canned pizza.

True, there are other fat people around... but they are not like me. They deserve to be the fat fucks they are. A bottle of wine only has 500 calories... so I am going to buy one now and pray that Ingrid that skinny thing doesn't come home with a bag of chips and a sac of candy.

note: I have no idea who that large naked man in the photo is but thankfully its not me or even one of my relatives. A fan of my work on Pax Acidus sent it in.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I hear ya my friend. In another life we were KINGS!!!


LOVE YOU. And I'm glad there is more to love.